It’s Only Daughter’s fault. She started it! This summer, she decided to download a certain language learning app and started to learn Japanese. She likes sushi, you see. And Japanese art, the manga and the anime. Kudos to her. She’s been sticking to it and practising almost daily. By all accounts, it’s a difficult language with a crazy difficult script. But the app in question makes it fun and has clever ways of making you want to keep going. Only Daughter was keen to share the fun. In a moment of weakness, I succumbed and downloaded it with a view to learning Greek. I love Greek food. I’m a big fan of the Greek sunshine and beaches. I love the Greek myths and legends. Looking back, I’ve had some amazing holidays in Greece. Ever since that first time when me and my (still) bestie (my first subscriber) went after A levels, just the two of us (it was a legendary, pre-internet, pre-mobile phones Grecian adventure) I was hooked. And then, I was lucky enough to live with my Greek friend (my second subscriber!) at Uni, and this forged a deep friendship which has endured through the decades, happily involving many mythical Greek holidays! Over the years, I managed to learn the Greek alphabet and a few words and simple phrases. I’d keep telling myself I’d learn the language, but you know, real life kicks in, and frankly, who has time? Learning a language is a long-term, difficult, time-consuming commitment. Becoming fluent, at my age, is a long shot. Knowing all of this (and I did), I can’t think why I ever agreed to download an app that promises to make it effortless and fun! Surely my finely tuned BS detector (if it’s too good to be true…) should have smelled the poop. Yet, here I am, 101 days later having spent 3330 minutes (or 55 hours) on said app, dedicating a blog post to the subject. If this isn’t a problematic addiction, I don’t know what is. But they suck you in sneakily because, as Only Daughter will confirm, it IS easy and fun (at first). They cunningly add in a competitive element, so now you think you’re winning… The endorphins kick in. Oh. Em. Gee. They have leader boards and leagues. You can go down as well as up. It turns out I’m totally helplessly sucked in by this kind of competitive incentive. I now have a notebook filled with Greek vocab, Greek verbs (past and present), Greek grammar. Which I have written in Greek script! My endorphin-addled brain quickly made me desperate enough to start studying between sessions. While I am sure that all this new learning is good for my middle-aged brain, it is becoming obvious that I cannot go on like this. Winning does make me happy, not gonna lie, but moderation is key. Like all difficult but worthwhile endeavours (and despite what these apps promise), there’s no such thing as miraculous progress. Practice undoubtedly leads to progress, but that’s hardly miraculous! To be fair, the app does encourage sustained practice (and then some). But ultimately, it’s all about the ten thousand hours. And I still have nine thousand nine hundred and 45 to go! Ever the optimist, I intend to keep going because I am enjoying the challenge, and I really do want to speak (highly imperfect) Greek. But I might ease up with the league-climbing urgency. Maybe I’ll find me a nice Greek class and learn it properly by talking to a human Greek teacher instead of an AI voice. Much as I am keen to impress my Greek friend when I next see her, she’ll understand if I go back to watching a wee bit of Netflix or just reading the odd good book. I’d have written this post earlier, but I was on the app… 9942 and counting! I’ll find time to write a more serious post before the new year. Probably!